The beauty in "can."

Remember when you were little and someone told you that you "couldn't" or "shouldn't" do something? Didn't that make you want to do it all the more? As I prepare to fly out to Vegas tonight for my fitness competition at Fitness America, I am reflecting on all the couldn'ts and shouldn'ts that have been thrown my way over the years...

To put it simply, and it may sound cliche, you CAN do anything you put your mind to. It's all in your mind. People fear what they "can't do" when in reality they CAN, they just let their fear control their entire existence. Trust me when I say, I don't walk across that stage in a bezazzled bikini fearless. I do it because I know the work I have put in: sweat, tears, caffiene withdrawals, sleepless nights, mind-numbing amounts of tilapia and celery later...I step a toe on that stage because I know beauty isn't just an outwardly thing- I know it lies within me...in my heart and in the heart of so many of my dear friends who are my fellow competitors. I don't go in expecting anything...medals, glory, trophies, accolades...I go in expecting to give it my all. For that my friends, is how you play the game.

You give it your all while all the naysayers and people who feel it is their place in life to question your diet, your lifestyle, your motives, your exercise plan...let them stay on the side where the naysayers belong...you don't hear their criticism anyhow...because all that is in your ears is the roar of the crowd and the beauty that beats within your chest. And no, it's not that bikini that makes you beautiful, or those clear heels...it's what you do in life to make a difference that counts.

Make it beautiful. Treat others kindly. Love people. Love those who continue to tell you that you can't. They'll come around, and if they don't...they were never your friends to begin with. I'm off to Vegas now to shine a light in a city of unending lights. Thank you all for your support and love and care through this whole training...I will be thinking of you as I stand on the stage! I will hear your positive voices and encouragement in my ears. Those of you who have stood by me, you know who you are. And I love you for it.
xoxo
Meg

Strength to Live Beautifully

"Speaking beautifully is little to the purpose unless one lives beautifully."

My heart still weighs heavy for Haiti. In a world of i-phones and CNN and instant updates, between facebook and twitter and supersizing our french fries and adding fancy new rims to our expensive cars, we have forgotten.

We have forgotten because we can't remember something we have never known.

Most of us don't know what it is like to wake up with a deep hunger in our bellies and not be able to reach for a pop tart. We complain that there's nothing left in our pantry when we are only lacking the Oreos or Ritz.

A blog I adore (livesayhaiti.blogspot.com) recently decided their family was going to CLEAN OUT the pantry before going to the grocery store, really clean it out...and I mean one child would eat beans and one would eat something totally different. There would be no uniformity to the meal and as I read this adventure this family went through, my eyes were opened to the many times I complain, "I just don't have anything to eat." It is an incredulous statement on my part when I know there is plenty for me to eat adorning my pantry.

This family that I speak of has been a constant source of encouragement to me as I have read through stories about their life in Haiti- they abandoned the luxuries of the United States and have chosen to raise their family in a place most would turn up their noses at and declare "unsafe, dirty, unfit for a family, scary, impoverished, etc." Yet, this family lives beautifully. In my opinion, they live more beautifully than most anybody I know...and I don't even know them personally. Sure, I know they aren't perfect, but I know that if I could be living my life the way they do, my heart would be filled to the brim with joy. I cannot wait to someday visit Haiti, maybe live there...meet my sponsor child who lives there...her name is Souvenir. I want to feed the hungry, help the sick, hold orphans. But I don't want to do it for a short time. I want that to be my life...may I be marked up, beaten up, bruised, get sick, get tired and worn out for the calling God has put on my life.

For all those times I haven't felt loved, beautiful...the times I have felt abandoned and like no one in the world would hold me close, I know that God whispers into my ear, "Daughter. I am here, I am holding you...live beautifully."

So I pray that I would have the strength to be brave and live beautifully, even in the times that I don't have the desire to. We have been blessed beyond all measure and I feel it's time we start living like that.

Fish, Fitness, & Oatmeal, oh my.

My co-workers are in fits because I have been eating so much tuna around the office. I apologize for the fishy smell, but with my fitness competition just 15 days or so away, I can't eat much of anything but tuna and chicken breast. At least with tuna I can buy the flavored ones. I'm partial to lemon-pepper and sweet&sour right now. :)


So I apologize for the sea-scented office, but hopefully it will help me do better in my competition. I am competing in my first national competition in Las Vegas, NV at Fitness America November 19th in the Miss Bikini division. I have previously competed in Fitness New Mexico and the OCB Natural Bodybuilding competion this past July. I am so excited for my 1st national show. I'm going to start trying to post some healthy recipes and workout ideas on my blog because my facebook seems to be getting hit with many messages from friends asking how to eat healthier and lose weight. I love those messages and love responding to each of them, but I thought keeping my blog updated would be helpful to all of you looking for information on nutrition and fitness!

A recipe I just recently tried were for protein pancakes, they are a delicious and healthy twist on a morning favorite.

Ingredients:

• 1/8 tsp of baking soda & 1/8tsp of baking powder
• a teeny drop or two of vanilla
• stevia sweetner(all natural, I use 1-2 packets for 2 pancakes)
• 1/2 cup oats
• Dash of Cinnamon (cinnamon is a vital part of diet for health and to boost metabolism, also tastes amazing in everything from oatmeal to coffee to lattes to pancakes!)
• a splash of vanilla almond milk (don't add much, it makes them runny)
  1 whole egg
• 3-4 egg whites

Voila! You make them as you would normal pancakes. Don't light them on fire like I did the 1st time! ;) You can eat them right away with a sugar-free or low-calorie syrup or just squeeze on a little agave nectar like I do. I like to save them in a ziploc in the fridge overnight and heat them up for 30 seconds in the microwave in the morning. It's a great idea for a grab-and-go breakfast and you can be sure they will get your metabolism going and fuel your morning in a healthy way!

What other ideas do you all have for breakfast? Do you eat breakfast at all?

This Story Must be Told.

Her hands told her story. Aged some, fingernails bitten down to pieces as they always were. The mark on her left hand ring finger where a wedding ring once clung, safely. A promise. She could still feel him next to her at night...almost hear his snoring that she never seemed to mind.
Because she promised. She promised to love him that day in her youth as a beautiful bride, her dark hair cascasding in curls down the bridal satin of her dress.
Through the snoring, the greying of the hair, the less than pleasant days...through the good times and the bad. In happiness and in want. In rags. In riches.
She promised.
Her aged hands dried the tears from her eyes with a soft tissue pressed to her still-youthful face.
He had slammed the door soon after the better part of 25 years. And in tears she would plead with her daughter every night to hope in something greater. To hope in the One who would never even reach for the door handle when the going was tough. She reassured her little one, a blonde young woman with freckles on the top of her nose that that man would come one day. In spite of it all, there was hope. For the one who never reached for the door handle would usher in a man.
Not a boy.
A man. Unfiltered love. Radiant eyes. One who would rather not live one more day on this earth without her daughter. She knew her daughter would be scooped up. Carried away by the prince she always dreamed of.
And no. He would never be perfect. But he would love in every way he knew how. And that would be more than enough. To wipe the tears from her daughter's face and make use of those laugh lines and dimples in her face once again. It had been so long since her baby girl had laughed. So long. As she sat with the tears burning her eyes she remembered the day her little girl had stopped laughing. She remembered the look on her daughter's face when she came back inside after begging her daddy with tears pouring down her face onto the hot July pavement...She felt the loss her daughter felt. A kick in the stomach. Her baby's pale face...puffy eyes from crying...the million questions she would have for years and years to come. The questions that would most certainly come when the man of her dreams would show up, put a beautiful sparkling ring on that finger and lift her little girl in his strong arms.
The questions of how was she to plan a wedding without her daddy there? Present. Interested in her life and who she was...who she loved with her whole heart. She couldn't bear to think of the wedding day. With no one to walk her daughter down the aisle. She knew these questions would come.
The tissue got damper with tears the more the thoughts flooded her mind. She pictured her little girl completely grown. Into a woman. In a room standing in front of a mirror...in the most breathtaking white dress not even a princess could envision.
"Mom, can you help me button up? Mom...where is my "something blue?" Ah...gosh Mom...I am so scared. But excited...but scared."
"I know little girl."
"Moooooom. I'm not little anymore. I'm getting married!"
"Oh I know. I keep forgettting. It's like I keep seeing you as you once were, running into my room at night in an oversized t-shirt you got at some concert asking me to put rollers in your hair!"
"Ha...oh I remember that....Mom?"
"Yes?"
"...I wish Dad was here."
"I know."
"Yeah. But it's okay...I think I'm okay."
"You are. You will be. Look straight into that wonderful man's eyes and don't look back. Hold fast to that love my little girl. And you do have one father who loves you more than anyone else. Ever. And he's watching you today. He's there Meggie."
"I know Mom..."
And He was. He was there. Nodding his approval as his precious daughter's dress sparkled and slid down the church aisle...closer to a beaming kind-hearted man. His eyes glistened with tears as she smiled at him. Part goofily to try and soothe the poor man's nerves. His eyes danced with laughter. As did hers. As did His as He watched, the wisdom of thousands of divine years beaming from his eyes...not from a seat in the church...from the heavens above.
And His laughter as the preacher said, "You make kiss the bride..." echoed the heavens. And His applause? That was the loudest of all...

Not really about Ed Hardy, Prada, or highlights.

Why do we lie to each other in the places where a lie shouldn't ever be passed through lips? Why do we lie to each other at all?

We honestly should be ashamed of ourselves. People who consider themselves to be a follower of Jesus Christ but never feel the desire to truly love someone for who they are, in spite of their flaws, in spite of their financial situation, family, reputation, struggles, etc.

How can we be so cold? No, maybe they don't wear true religion jeans, carry a prada bag, have touched-up highlights, or have squeezed into an overrated ed hardy t-shirt that costs enough to feed the hungry children of the world for years of their life...does that mean that Jesus doesn't hurt for them? Does that mean that His all-mighty loving heart doesn't beat for them? bleed for them?

Then why doesn't our "christian" heart beat at all?

How can we turn the other cheek and look the other way when we see someone alone in a place they should never be alone? in a world with so much hurt that this could be the last day they choose to live? and we, a generation who claims to love Christ cannot see past our own proud and selfish desires?

How is it possible we let our friendships that were once so strong with these people simply slip away and never ask them about their lives ever again? Was Jesus really a small talker?

"hi how are you i like your shirt/earrings/shoes/haircut yeah awesome i'm doing fine. bye."

Life is not a game to see how truly fake we can be.
If we serve in ministry, we love people and care about the details of their lives. We invest our time and energies into people even if we don't get along with them or necessarily agree with everything they say. Jesus constantly walked the streets with the "worst of sinners." The people who the rest of the world pointed at and laughed at and deemed untouchable.

I see more christians pointing fingers these days than holding hands and saying, "I will walk with you."
The guilt is on my hands as well. I am not exempt/perfect/on a self-righteous tangent.
But I can see. and i can share. because I have been the victim and the pointer.

I find it absolutely disgusting. May God save our wretched idealistic it's all about me attitudes. May he somehow redeem our hearts to begin to beat again for the lost and not just for somebody who is beautiful or looks just like us.

May we begin to care about the things that matter in this lifetime which doesn't include money, our reputations, our social standing, our cars and clothes and jewelry. May God burn the ME ME ME from our eyes in order that we may clearly see people hurting and us doing nothing to give them hope. may we recognize those we have hurt and apologize, get on our hands and knees and beg for forgiveness for being lousy witnesses for Jesus Christ's perfect and unashamed love. I'm tired of my own smooth knees; i think it's time to get on my knees and rough 'em up a bit in prayer.
Lord, have mercy on us for choosing to ignore your voice and allowing our voices to selfishly muffle yours.
Speak to your children Oh Father God for some of us are listening.